Last night as we lay in bed I asked "are we ok?" just before we slept. 1 hour later we are still talking about. I didn't pick a good moment, or the right things to say.
But I realise now I need to get my making-own-life-better back on track. There is just so much happening right now. We're packing to move house and I am trying to work harder, but we're both at home all day every day which is just making everything 100 times worse.
She needs more friends, and a job and some new interests. I am scared she will meet someone when she does this but I have to push her to do it because currently she doesn't really have a life of any reasonable description. I keep telling her to make herself happy. She has started looking for a job but it's slow progress on account of the house move.
I still don't really know what she thinks of me. I realised the other day that I don't even know what she meant by us losing the closeness. I took it to mean she wasn't attracted to me anymore, but thinking more about it, maybe that is not it, or not all of it. Anyway I can't ask her about that now.
It's back to living life aloof, meeting people and working on myself. We goto Egypt on Thursday for a week without the kid. This is our reconnecting emotionally holiday.
Less time spent together, but quality time when we do, is what we need. And her to get her own life.
At LEAST we are still together, even if there is no trust right now.
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